Hairball, hot flashes, or perhaps the “other side” of bitchy??

This is the day when you wake up

and you fucking HATE everybody,

everything

and EVERYONE!!

 

 

Hmm. . .

I think menopause is starting to kick in. 

That’s what you get when you’re standing to close to someone’s grave. 

Or standing too close to someone who’s high on lithium!

 

 

And just so you know. . .

THIS ISN’T A FUCKING POEM!!!!

 

 

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did “DRACULA” suck. . .literally??

 

 

Let’s begin withWomen in black lipstick. . .I’m confused!?!?

 

 

Was it just me, or did the TV series premiere of  “Dracula” suck?

 

Okay.  Even I have to admit that I hyped myself up over this premiere, even “Milestoned” the damn thing on my site because for those who kind of know me, they know I like anything vampire.  So after much anticipation, even taking a nap (yes, A Nap!) just so I wouldn’t fall asleep during the show because I do have a tendency of doing that, even I was slightly disappointed.  Maybe it was the lighting in the show?  Maybe it was the entire cast?  Maybe it was the gibberish in dialogue?  Well whatever it was I put together a top-ten list of what bothered me the most in hopes with coping  with my disappointment.

David Letterman Top Ten List

1:  Why the producers of NBC’s Dracula decided to take from the formula of the original Bram Stoker’s Dracula, meaning characters, is beyond me! 

 

 

Dracula pic 32:  Jonathan Rhys Meyers, while devilishly handsome, I found his performance as “Dracula” slighly weak.  Hmm. . .maybe in the coming weeks that will change.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3:  The character of Mina in my opinion was just a “bad cast”.  Mina is blandly pretty, and she lacks that animal magnetism.  Pairing her with Jonathan Rhys Meyers is like pairing Oil and Water. . .they just didn’t mix.

 

4:  Jonathan Harker must die and bring Keanu Reeves back!

Bram Stoker Jonathan

 

5:  I was expecting the old Lucy to emerge from the new Lucy; think Alien and that spaghetti dinner scene. . .you know, when that baby Alien popped out of the stomach of that crew member over dinner?  Was that romantic or what?  

 

6:  The blond seductress (you know the one who spent the better part of her “Part” trying to seduce Dracula) just didn’t fit the part.  If Dracula (now the TV series) isn’t careful, SHE will be the death of the series.

 

7:  The fight scene between Dracula and what’s his face on the roof lacked action.  How dare Dracula fight. . .vampires don’t fight, they’re too quick and clever for that shit!

 

Bram Stoker Renfield8:  Mr. Renfield. . .I think I preferred the original character from Bram Stoker’s Dracula only because he was dedicated and I loved his do!  (hair-do, that is).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

9:  I found the Trailers more exciting. . .particularly that scene where Dracula is lying in a sea of naked women draped in red silk; kind of reminded me of Eminem’s video “Superman”.Eminem Superman

 

 

David Letterman10:  Last but not least, where was David Letterman?

 

 

 

 

 

 

So in closing, I will admit that I am a still a fan of anything vampire (except for Vampire Diaries, I’m still a little po’d about their show’s sexual content considering Vampire Diaries is based on a YA book series for readers 18 and younger. . .go figure!) so I will continue to watch, for better or for worse:).

 

 

 

DUCK DYNASTY in books?. . .You Got To Be Kidding Me!!

 

 

Wal-Mart.

And this is where my rant begins.

Wal-Mart.  Book aisle.  Best-Sellers.  Duck. . .Dynasty?

And right then and there I could’ve Quacked all over myself!

 Duck Dynasty pic 1

(UGH!!)

So far I’m a little peeved about Duck Dynasty actually having a published book. . .wait!  I think they’ve got four??  So what to make of this. . .I really don’t know only to say that I’m rather disappointed with the publishing industry for even considering giving Duck Dynasty book deals.  Duck Dynasty, and IMO, is like the Macarena, is like Kato Kailen, is like Gangnam Style (love the song, btw!), and last but not least, like every “one-hit wonder” that has existed on the face of this earth for more than 15 minutes or less. . .Duck Dynasty is exactly this “a one-hit wonder” where I’m in it for the long haul.  So now I ponder:  Is the publishing industry selling out?  Has the publishing industry actually gone mad?  I mean do I have to be on a reality TV show just to get a book deal myself? 

 

(Hmm. . .Maybe I should grow a beard and slap on some daisy dukes?)

 

It saddens me to think that there might be some truth about today’s publishing industry opening more doors for reality TV celebs and not necessarily for those “non” meaning us struggling authors.  You mean to tell me that reading about a TV celeb is more interesting than reading a good, GOOD story?  And if so, does this mean that authors are becoming extinct because publishers (and agents) would rather deal with a “one-hit wonder” and not necessarily a career author? 

 

Well if this is the case, then I’m screwed, literally! 

 

And if this is the case, there’s no need for me to continue ranting and raving on.  I’ll just save my keystrokes for something more purposeful than to waste it on a sitcom that will be forgotten faster than it was conceived!

 

Duck Dynasty. . .yeah right!  I think I’ll find more pleasure watching Kim and Ray J getting it on!  bth_ray_j_kim_kardashian

(ooh, la la!)